Big Picture Stuff: In order to keep things more logically organized and not let this journal get too hideously long, the underlying cosmology of the SubAwake universe has been laid out in two deviations:

SubAwake TOE One: [link] and Two: [link]


I've decided to link this journal to the Fanfic Soundtracks one, and keep them both updated. If you're wondering, yes, I mainly do this as a means to hopefully force myself to retain interest in writing these stories. But! It's also for anyone who has questions about any part of the fics. Hopefully, it will eventually address many issues to that end. Right now it's mainly SubAwake related, but Love and Wrath questions are welcome too.

Warning: There may be some spoilers for chapters to come if you read closely.

Q&A:

-Basically some of the questions that I've been asked along the way...and some that I've had to step back and ask myself:

Why Pepito looks human (most of the time):

The appearance of the characters in SubAwake is realistic, meaning that some of the stylistic or humorous elements in both Invader Zim and Squee have been removed or altered to be more realistic. This means that even though Dib appeared to be the size of a toddler in IZ when he was 11 or 12, in the SubAwake universe, he would have been average hight for that age. Zim was his height then, so they were both about 5' in fifth grade (in the show). In the story Zim gained roughly 3” since that time (Irkens appear to keep growing as adults, at least under some circumstances).

In the same manner, Pepito needed some tweaking because appearance is a big issue in gaining public appeal (and being elected to public office someday). There was also the question of how an angel (a spiritual being), in this case Satan, could spawn a child with a human woman. The answer to this in SubAwake was that he possessed the body of a (Hispanic) human follower to woe Pepito's mother. The resulting child, Pepito, is actually completely human from a biological standpoint. Half of his spiritual energy came from his mother and half from Satan, meaning that spiritually he is half-demon.

Because of his being half-demon in spirit, people who can see past the limitations of the physical world (who see ghosts, demons, angels, gods, all kinds of nonmatterial things) could see the difference in his soul when he was younger, before he learned to hide it. He doesn't use a glamor or any kind of false disguise to make himself look human or attractive (although he probably has that ability). His human appearance is real, and most people couldn't see past it anyway. His infernal appearance (similar to his appearance in the comic) is also real, in a different (spiritual instead of material) way.

The Origin of the 1%:

Those who are capable of seeing Pepito's infernal nature when he is not hiding it are part of the 1% of humans that are highly useful to Shmee's people (the ones that Bitters wanted). Throughout the fic, it is revealed that they may be a result of angelic/demonic/godly inference with the human genome, mostly though interbreeding.

As mentioned elsewhere, spiritual beings do not contribute to offspring genetically (because they have no genetic material). Furthermore, they are more likely to seek out human mates who can see/feel them, so the trait for being able to see such things (and preform various types of magic) was already present within the gene pool to begin with.

What most likely happened: Because spiritual/energy beings who had/have an inclination to mate with humans for whatever reason would need to at least choose two humans who already had the trait to see them (a man and a woman, one to mate with and one to possess for the process), the trait was positively selected for, and children of such unions were more likely not only to have it, but to be heterogeneous (even though the process is likely more complicated than simple Mendelian genetics) for it. After centuries of selective breeding on the part of some spiritual beings, a new type of human arose, both genetically and spiritually.

The basic trait for such abilities is still present in low levels within the general, unaltered population, meaning that not everyone who has such abilities (or untapped potential for them) is descended from a nonhuman being. Also, the trait is more concentrated in some people than others, and actual development of abilities/skills seems to be dependent on multiple factors such as: percentage of ancestors with such abilities (usually, the more there is, the easier it is to learn), social conditioning, level of social conformity, other personality traits that conflict with or reinforce the likelihood that a person will pursue such abilities or have dedication to learn them.

In Chapter 11 Pepito explains that his father has had an association with the Diablo family for a long time, suggesting that the family name arose from that association and that Satan had been manipulating that family's genetics for many generations to get someone powerful enough to father Pepito.

Sexuality of Demons and Pepito:

The line of thinking I went with is that angels and demons do not have biological sex or an organic need to reproduce (hence the Bible saying angels don't and shouldn't, but not can't), but that they are capable of feeling a range of emotions (though some of those emotions are sinful from a Christian pov and would cause them to fall). Lust is a byproduct of reproduction (it is used in social negotiations that are not of a reproductive nature in humans and other animals, but it first evolved to encourage reproduction), so there is no inherent reason for angels/demons to feel it. But emotions can be learned from other sentient beings (like how different cultures sometimes have emotions that are not experienced in other cultures, but can be learned by cultural immersion), so some angels (mostly fallen) learned it from humans. And since they're spirits, they can change form or the perception of themselves through conscious effort, meaning they could choose to have sex organs and sexual relations.

But basically, since the lust didn't originate with them, what usually happens is a demon falls in love (probably at first not in the usual human/romantic sense, but in the spiritual sense that Pepito told Todd about in ch 17) with a human, then, through being close to that human, develops sexual desires that fulfill the wants of that human. Or the sexual act could work the same without the falling in love part, and just be based on tempting a human to sin, curiosity, or a need to feed on sexual energy (succubuses and incubuses). So, a demon's sexuality is often determined by the desires of the person that they are currently engaging with.

Some demons get a taste for certain types of sex and such from past experiences with humans. There are also other reasons that demons would want to engage in sex besides pure lust, which influence the things they like in that area, and that's somewhat dependent on their personality and their favorite sins and the like. Sometimes sex has more instrumental purposes like having offspring (even though from a Christian pov they shouldn't be doing that).

Pepito thinks that one of the reasons that other people's sexual fantasies and gratification is so good for him is because of the demonic tendency to experience sexual pleasure through the other person by giving it. And there's also the fact that he takes pride in being able to pull people apart to find out what they like and make them let themselves go (which would feed into the sin angle a bit). And the whole pansexual thing, which is partly because Demons don't have a set sex and are less likely to think that small things like that matter. But he's also human, and does have his own sex drive independent from others, though it is shaped largely by all that stuff.

Anyway, the thing with Pepito liking BDSM comes partly from what I said last time about him liking to tear down illusions and make people face themselves. It's because it requires trust and honesty and a real connection (with the other person and oneself) in a way that most casual sex doesn't. So, it kind of forces the bonding experience that sex should in theory carry, but rarely does. But also, the bonding, though consensual and usually not manipulative, may work in a similar (but far less drastic) way as Stockholm syndrome on a very basic level, the same level that many initiation rituals are effective on, especially the ones that have an element of fear or pain that require trust. So it would make sense for it to be something that he might do with some initiates, but probably not so much randomish high school people that he sometimes sleeps with...at least not anything very heavy. And how much he gets into the BDMS and how far he takes it has a lot to do with how much the other person is enjoying it because of the demonic stuff.

Related Article (about Demon sex and sexuality): [link]


Letta's Sexuality:

Sexuality is more complex, fluid and intricate than most people are willing to admit, so many of the characters I write about will not fit into nice, neat little social boxes. Letta is no exception.

She identifies as a lesbian, but does find some (usually feminine looking) men attractive (but has no desire to actually have sex with them herself). She has a sexual interest in men in so far as slash (male/male stuff) being an interest and turn on. Despite this (and contrary to what Pepito thinks), she isn't secretly straight-up bisexual (unless you have a really strict definition maybe). Men only turn her on when they're with other men, and she is only interested in women for herself. Since she has a sexual interest in both women and men, she is not actually grossed out by hetero sex (even though she pretends to be, partly to reinforce her identity as a lesbian); it just doesn't do anything for her (she finds it boring and dangerous- pregnancy and STDs).

There is a lot of complexity and some gray area here (about where the line should be drawn between categories of sexualities) because sexuality is more like a set of intersecting spectrums full of fluid variety than a set of boxes, of which only one can be checked. And it's also got a lot to do with identity politics and social construction of sexuality as identity.

Rosemary: Character and Name

Wrath and Love (another Pepsquee story by me) is a crossover with Rosemary's Baby in which most of the things that happened in the movie are true in that universe, but that is not entirely true for SubAwake.

Basically, Pepito's mother needed a first name, and I choose Rosemary as a tribute to Rosemary's Baby because I think that the movie inspired her character (I think she is a tribute to Rosemary in the comic).

The reasons why:
-Pepito tells his class that his family just moved to Squee's town from New York, where Rosemary's Baby takes place.
-Pepito says that his parents meet on a cruise, which is the setting of the hallucination that Rosemary had during the Satanic ritual in which she was raped by Satan. It sounds almost like a modified story that his parents might have told him later.
-There is a superficial physical resemblance between Rosemary and Pepito's mother: small build, blond hair, pretty, perky, etc.
-Pepito's mother is “a good Christian woman” and Rosemary was raised Catholic (and obviously still retains and then regains some devotion and belief in the movie).
-Rosemary character in the movie is pretty naive, much like Pepito's mother in the comic and her lack of knowledge about her husband being Satan (reflecting perhaps the fact that in the movie, Rosemary didn't get that her husband-not Satan-was the biggest jerk ever and that she was carrying Satan's child until near the end, despite all the warnings).
-Also! This is less substantial than the others, but one of the important Satanists who comes to see the baby (Adrian) after his birth is a Spanish man, and if we assume that Satan took a host for the rape....
-Also way less substantial, but Rosemary wanted to call the kid Andy (light and fluffy for the Antichrist, right?), and Pepito(means Joseph) is another light and fluffy name for all things considered.

But the key word here is tribute/homage . They are not exactly the same people (there are a few obvious differences, such as Pepito's mother being a social worker) in the comic or SubAwake, and their histories are not quite the same either. So, basically, in SubAwake, I pick and choose some things from Rosemary's character when filling in unknown details for Pepito's mother.

Side Note: Pepito's middle name (in both fics) is Adrian because that is what the coven wanted to name him in Rosemary's Baby.

Here's a vid with another good song (Rosemary's Baby by Fantomas)and Rosemary when she was younger (23, think?): [link]

Also, this (Mia Farrow, duh) is kind of how Rosemary (my name for Pepito's mom) looks in Wrath and Love when she's older (and W&L is a Rosemary's Baby Crossover): [link]
And this (but it takes a while to load): [link]

Evil Gaz:

Yeah. I wanted her to be a little less apathetic, so I tried to imagine what she would be like if she cared in any way about something besides video games. Based on what I know about her, this is what happened. She's kind of a cross between Eric Cartman, Wednesday Adams and a character from an original story of mine ([link]).

Also, a lot of the characters in the story kill people on a semi-regular basis, and it got me thinking about the different ways that they kill people. Nny does it in a very direct, blood way, pretty much on impulse. Pepito's victims (now that he's older) are more thought out and deserving than Nny's and he kills them using magic/his powers. Zim kills people haphazardly and on accident mostly cause he is an unstoppable death machine.

Gaz is one of the smartest people on the planet (maybe THE smartest), so I don't think she would be very impulsive like Nny. She's a girl, so she's more likely to prefer indirect, social violence to physical violence. She was practically raised by video games, so she sees the world kind of like a simulated strategy game. She has some major sadistic leanings and a penchant for dooming people. For Gaz, death probably wouldn't be enough of a punishment in itself. She would probably want to plunge them into a nightmare would from with there is no escape before possibly letting them die (not sure if whether or not they actually die is important to her).

More Trivial Trivia:
-The little things:

Vayoween's Name:
Her name is actually kind of a parody of the kind of names that Pagans tend to give their children. At first it was going to be Arowen from LOTR, but I wanted it to be a little more original (like her parents wanted it to sound Tolkienian or something). Also, I am Pagan would probably name any child I had something pagany (just look at my screen name!), so I'm making fun of myself too.

SubAwake Philosophies (and religions and things):

-The underlying philosophy of the story is pantheistic ([link]) and Blackian (based on the teachings of William Blake as relieved though his poetry). For details about how this pertains to the story, see the SubAwake TOE: [link]

There are also others that come up because of their association with some of the characters:

-Satanism (Pepito, Thelma-though she's a poser):

The Satanism in the story is inspired by many real-life sources:
-John Milton and Paradise Lost and other literary sources (literary Satanism) that tend to be inspiration for real Satanisms.
-Philosophy is a mix of elements from the Church of Satan (a form of Athestic Satanism), the First Church of Satan (a form of Pantheistic Satanism and a middle instead of left hand path), various actual modern Theistic Satanisms (which worship Satan as an actual deity).
-Some of the trappings and rituals and such are a mix of real Satanism and Christian stereotypes (and real Satanism sometimes uses the stereotypes, such as Black Masses, to help with deprogramming of Christian ideas through psychodrama, although out of necessity some elements are over the top-Most real Satanists do not believe in a personal Antichrist or Dark Messiah at all, for example).

Links with info:

Variates of Theistic Satanism: [link]
Church of Satan: [link]
First Church of Satan: [link]

-Santaism (Leon, Membrane):

Based on Invader Zim episode, The Most Horrible X-mas Ever, in which the myth of Santa has taken on a even stronger hold on the popular imagination, and split away from Christianity even more while at the same time retaining its own religious fever. Even though the most popular western tale is associated with Saint Nicholas, there are other “Santa” myths around the world, some older and not associated with Christianity to begin with, making Santaism a diverse, world wide religion with various interpretations of Santa and his (or her in some cases) origins. Some believers still practice Santaism as an extension of another religions, though most have simply embraced Santa without any baggage. In some sects, Santa had taken on characteristics of major deities from previous religions (such as the belief that he will return to the world to bring peace and take his rightful place as ruler of the world).

Membrane is more of an AntiSantaist (ever since Santa brought him socks as a child), maintaining that Santa is an evil being and thus having built the AntiSanta Arsenal for the purposes of eliminating him for the good of all mankind.

-Wicca (Vayoween):

Wicca is currently one of the fastest growing religions in the US (the fastest the last time I checked). Though much of what is available for the masses is a water-down, over simplified version of the religion, it seems likely that it will survive into the future in some form. Even now, it is becoming more mainstream, with some physical college programs offering minors in it, as well as legal ordination into the clergy becoming available. There are now second and even third generation Wiccans, and as the religions spreads, this will become more common.

-Atheism (Letta, Mark):

-Catholicism (Rosemary, Brian, Jennifer, Edgar):

The Catholic Church has been around for quite a while and shows signs of changing with the times (currently taking up environmentalism and poverty prevention as serious religious issues among other changes) while still retaining most of its core teachings.

Sidenotes: Rosemary is a liberal Christian (something else I took from Rosemary's Baby, but also a trend among Christian sociology/social work people). Brian is a liberal, almost secular Christian. Jennifer was raised by very conservative, somewhat fundamentalist Christians and retains some issues from that. Edgar is probably somewhere in the middle, leaning left.

-Resurrectionists (Amanda/Saint Judith):

Christianity has been diverse and in a state of change since the beginning (when there were even more differences between sects than today, when most of what we have now is based on Paulonian Christianity). New forms crop up nearly daily. There are definite death cult elements in Paulonian teachings as is, and it a world as cracked out as IZ, I think that the existence of this kind of “Jesus as Zombie” version makes sense.

Resurrectionist hymn (from Ch 13): [link]

-Spiritualism (Dib, Tess):

Theism (usually an impersonal pantheistic form of monotheism) with a belief in an astral realm with spirits that exist on different levels, depending on their level of spiritual evolution, that can be contacted (though séances and mediums, etc) by humans for the purposes of learning and growth.

This has been a popular base for right hand path/white light occult practices and beliefs.

-Agnosticism (Johnny C., Devi):

"The philosophical view that the truth value of certain claims — particularly metaphysical claims regarding theology, afterlife or the existence of deities, spiritual-beings, or even ultimate reality — is unknown or, depending on the form of agnosticism, inherently impossible to prove or disprove. It is often put forth as a middle ground between theism and atheism,[1] though it is not a religious declaration in itself, and it is occasionally argued that the terms are not mutually exclusive, since agnosticism refers to knowledge, while atheism and theism refer to belief." -From Wikipedia

Todd is agnostic in a personal way in the beginning of the fic. He ends up a Pantheist by the end, though he still doesn't subscribe wholly to any one specific religion.

Devi's listed above because her dislikes (in the back of the director's cut) include "people who think they know ANYTHING about religion". Nny's here because the Admin. guy (who may or may not be Saint Peter) in Heaven told him that that, according to their files on him, "you aren't the type to believe me no matter what I say" in regards to him being dead and in Heaven.

In SubAwake I tend to think that Gaz would most likely go here too, but more because she doesn't care to know the truth so much. But I'm not sure she would be the ultra doubting kind like Nny, so her experiences might inform her beliefs.

warning!: Spoiler for Wrath and Love:

Even though SubAwake ignores this, there is a moment before Dib comes in to the living room in Bad Bad Rubber Piggy where Gaz is watching something on TV that looks like an extreme version of Pepito's demonic form in Hell. She changes the channel when she notices Dib behind her, and in Wrath and Love that is part of the inspiration for her being a Satanist. Also, in The Rise of Zit-boy, she is seen reading a book called "Punch Club", an obvious reference to Fight Club. Since that's the only book we see her read, I've assumed that it is one of her favorites. The main female character in the movie is named Marla Singer.

-Social Democracy (Dib):

Links for Things:

-Miss Bitters as an alien looks something like this: [link]

Notes: These aliens are actually pink (or wearing some kind of pink mask thing judging by the yellowish green of the skin on the back of their heads, which is somewhat visible) on the back cover of Squee's Wonderful Big Giant Book of Unspeakable Horrors. At first I didn't notice this, but I like my colors (or almost any other colors...) better.

-Free Fiction Source/Inspiration Materials:

IZ Episodes: [link]

Rosemary's Baby (Movie): [link]

Download of JTHM, Squee and I Feel Sick (I know these things are hard to find in stores, but please order them online when you get a chance): [link]

-My ffnet profile: [link]


SubAwake Fan Arts:

-Pepsquee Kiss it better by Tugera: [link]
Notes: From deleted scene.

-SA Pepito by ShiiLovesHim: [link]
Notes: Pepito in human form

-SA Todd Doodles by ShiiLovesHim: [link]

-Dib What...by BrokenBloodRight: [link]

Pet -SQUEE- by DesdemonaKakalose: [link]

SubAwakenings Comic Sketch by ShiiLovesHim: [link]

SubAwake Sims:

-Todd's hair in Part 1: [link]
-Todd's haircut in Part 2: [link]
-Zim's new wig in Part 2: [link]

Fan Fiction (SubAwake and Wrath and Love) Soundtracks: [link]

Folders Contianing the Fics on DA:

Wrath and Love: [link]
Crack Pairings: [link]
SubAwake: [link]
The Fluff: [link]

Extra SubAwake Stuff:

S.A. Ch 15 (Now Part Two...somewhere)PreV:
[link]
S.A. Based one shot: Now You're Family Too:
[link]
S.A. Deleted Scene: PepSquee
[link]
S.A. Fake News Clipping for Ch 18:
[link]



Clubs:


Stamps:















Current Avatar made by: ~Falln-Avatars: [link]